Hi All! I decided to write this semi-short blog about 13 things I didn't know about labor! As many of you know, I went into labor (got induced) at 37 weeks so it was a tad early. I was just a few days shy of going to an all day "labor preparation" class with David. I don't know what to call it! Ha...anyways my actual labor story is too long and too personal to share at the moment so I decided to share just a portion of it for now! If you'd like to read David's version (it's shorter with not as much detail) then you can read that Here.
This is just my personal experience. Yours may be, and probably is, MUCH different than mine so please no judging! :)
These are in NO particular order- they are just as they came to mind!
1. "Checking" for dilation hurts! I have watched millions of "A baby story" on TLC, watched tons of YouTube videos, read many blogs, talked to multiple people but I had never heard ONCE that getting "checked" is painful! I had heard it was uncomfortable but I didn't know "checking" for dilation hurts! Now that I have been through it once, I will definitely remember to be much more strict about getting checked in the future. (IF and again I say- IF I ever had another one...) It is awful. It felt like they had their whole fist in my gut! After getting checked for the first time I remember thinking, "Wow, I have no idea what's coming do I?"
2. Stronger contractions doesn't mean more dilation. I had always thought the stronger the contractions, the closer you were to having your baby. Nope. I remained at 3 cm for the longest time. There was a point when I was getting uncomfortable and hoping I was "at least a 4!" but no. I quickly learned that stronger contractions doesn't mean more dilation. It wasn't until my water broke that I really started to progress. After that- all hell broke loose!
3. Epidurals Wear Off- No I don't mean after you deliver- I mean they wear off during labor! Yeah I know what you're thinking...so I will just say it: YES I got an epidural and NO I don't regret it...
Once I got the epidural, I was able to relax and focus on the task at hand: getting this baby out! I didn't feel sorry or like a loser for getting one, I was just glad I could focus. My nurse asked if I wanted to sit up to see if laboring that way would help- so I did. No more than 5 minutes later I could feel pain again. 10 minutes later and the contractions were in full swing again but my legs were the only thing numb! I didn't understand. I tried lying on each side and nothing helped. I was in complete pain again! After what seemed like hours, my anesthesiologist came in and saw me sitting up. My eyes were closed from the pain but I recognized her voice when she said, "No no no, (talking to my nurse) she needs to be on her back! The epidural only works when she's flat. The medication goes towards gravity." Now, I'm thinking, "How in the world does my nurse not know that!?" I don't know if I got a different epidural than other people but I always thought they continued to work! Well, they dont. Epidurals wear off. At least mine did. I was OK and comfortable because I remained on my back but, when it came time to pushing, I had to sit up and yup!- it wore off again.
4. Some hospitals don't allow photography. As gross or morbid as it sounds, I really wanted a picture of the baby's head coming out of me. I know someone who got a picture of the baby crowning and the shot is just amazing! This isn't a picture you'd wanna post to facebook or anything but I was one of the ones she allowed to see the picture and it was just awesome. Nothing is more incredible than life! I wanted that but unfortunately, some hospitals don't allow photography. I was able to have pictures taken before anything crazy was happening and once the baby was completely out but not during. It was a bit of a bummer. I still got some pretty cool and gross pictures of everything after she was born! *Always ask your Doctor questions like this so you aren't bummed at the last minute like I was!
5. YOU don't always deliver the placenta. I always heard that 10-20 minutes after the baby comes out, mom delivers the placenta. This wasn't the case for me. As soon as the baby popped out, the doctor passed the baby to the nurses and they immediately started working on getting the placenta out. They started massaging my belly and not more than 5 seconds later, they just pulled my placenta out by the cord! Much to my surprise, you don't always deliver the placenta. I guess they figured, pulling it out was easier. Very strange. I didn't get to see it and I kind of hoped I would. I don't know why- curiosity I guess! David said it looked like a semi-deflated, bloody balloon.
6. You can still feel yourself push with an epidural. A lot of women had told me that a con to having an epidural meant you can't feel yourself pushing which means you probably aren't pushing very good. This could mean no progress, possible vacuum assistance or c-section. For me, I could feel myself pushing and even though I was pushing for awhile, I still pushed the baby out without a vacuum. If this is a fear of yours, don't worry. You can still feel yourself pushing with an epidural. I was glad that they let me push for as long as they did. A few times the doctor mentioned a c-section but my nurse let me keep pushing.
7. Epidurals come with catheters. This is gross and I really hated this part but it is very necessary. If you don't have a catheter while you have an epidural, you will pee all over yourself. I didn't want to sit in my own urine just as much as the nursing staff didn't want to have to keep changing my sheets! I never saw the thing because it was out immediately after the baby came out so that was the good part. In fact, shortly after delivery and the epidural removal, they helped me up to the bathroom. Epidurals come with catheters but they are gone before you even notice they are there!
8. Pitocin means you can't get out of bed. Pitocin is what they used to induce me and one of the requirements while being on it is that they need to use a continuous fetal monitor on you at all times. I could only be off if it when I needed to use the bathroom but otherwise I had to stay in bed! This was so frustrating because I wanted to labor in different positions, walk around or bounce on a ball. I didn't realize I'd have to remain in bed at all times. They need to monitor the baby's heart rate so they use these ichy belts and they strap them to your tummy and you can't move. I hated that Pitocin means you can't get out of bed. Had I known that prior to agreeing to it, I probably would have asked for something else! I was so naive to all this stuff. I strongly advise you to be completely aware of everything you agree to!
9. Breathing is so important. It sounds silly but it is so true. A birthing class is a VERY useful tool that I, unfortunately, did not take advantage of. If you cannot control your breathing and focus through each contraction, it is going to be quite difficult. For me, I basically went into a panic attack when things got intense and I just could not get my breathing under control. My heart rate when out of wack, the baby's dropped and the nurse began getting worried. I cannot stress this enough- breathing is so important. If you've been through labor then you know what I'm talking about. Each contraction requires so much concentration. You have to breath and remember what is happening. My body knew what was happening but my mind was not on the same page. I remember praying that God just take the pain away but then I remembered that He said it would hurt and boy did He keep His promise. In the midst of my pain, I felt His presence- it was the most awesome feeling.
10. 3 hours of pushing feels like 3 minutes! I had a clock right above me so I could see exactly what time it was. Half way through pushing I was so exhausted and so tired that I literally fell asleep between each contraction and push. It probably seemed like forever to everyone in the room but to me, 3 hours felt like 3 minutes! Maybe I was just so out of it that I didn't care. When I saw my baby for the first time, those 3 hours felt like nothing. It was all so worth it!
11. My baby wasn't beautiful right when she came out. I always heard that baby's come out looking like total aliens after birth but, yours. Oh, yours will be the most gorgeous human you've ever laid eyes on. Please don't judge me when I say this but my baby was not gorgeous as soon as she came out. She was purple, bloody and had a gnarly cone head! (thank you 3 hours of pushing!) She was my precious baby girl and I loved her to the stars and back! I cried like I have never cried before because she was mine. I loved her more in a second than I could ever love anyone in years. But she was not cute- YET! Once they got her cleaned, changed and bundled up, then yes, she was adorable! I could see her face instead of blood and icky white goo. I saw her cute little nose and perfect lips! I kissed those lips the second she was in my arms. My baby wasn't beautiful right when she came out, but it certainly did not take long for that to change!
12. Seeing/feeling baby's head doesn't mean she's almost out. About half way through pushing, I heard, "Oh my gosh, I see her head!" Then I'd relax and the head would disappear! I'd push again and her head would almost come out and then it would suck back in. It wasn't until I pushed her head about halfway out that it stayed out! After her head came out the rest of her shortly followed. At one point I reached down and felt her hair! However, feeling baby's head doesn't mean she's almost out! Feeling her physically was super cool but it doesn't mean she's going to just slip right out. I had to wait and push for another couple of hours but that was still a neat milestone while pushing!
13. Being induced doesn't mean baby is coming soon. When the doctor first told us I was being induced he also said, "We'll have a baby by tonight!" Umm...no. I think by "tonight" he actually meant 2 and a half days later. Close though. Being induced doesn't mean baby is coming soon, so don't count on everything you hear at first. Birth is something so incredible but so unpredictable. We know what is going to happen but we have no clue in which order those things will occur.
At the end of the day, I love my L & D story because it is mine. It is unique and exactly how it was supposed to be. God was with me every step of the way and that is why I am completely content with it. I am so grateful for my amazing David who never left my side, my mom, Lindsey and Sophia. They were with me from start to finish and I couldn't have done it without their support.
Here's a few pictures from the best day of my life! :)
This is just my personal experience. Yours may be, and probably is, MUCH different than mine so please no judging! :)
These are in NO particular order- they are just as they came to mind!
1. "Checking" for dilation hurts! I have watched millions of "A baby story" on TLC, watched tons of YouTube videos, read many blogs, talked to multiple people but I had never heard ONCE that getting "checked" is painful! I had heard it was uncomfortable but I didn't know "checking" for dilation hurts! Now that I have been through it once, I will definitely remember to be much more strict about getting checked in the future. (IF and again I say- IF I ever had another one...) It is awful. It felt like they had their whole fist in my gut! After getting checked for the first time I remember thinking, "Wow, I have no idea what's coming do I?"
2. Stronger contractions doesn't mean more dilation. I had always thought the stronger the contractions, the closer you were to having your baby. Nope. I remained at 3 cm for the longest time. There was a point when I was getting uncomfortable and hoping I was "at least a 4!" but no. I quickly learned that stronger contractions doesn't mean more dilation. It wasn't until my water broke that I really started to progress. After that- all hell broke loose!
3. Epidurals Wear Off- No I don't mean after you deliver- I mean they wear off during labor! Yeah I know what you're thinking...so I will just say it: YES I got an epidural and NO I don't regret it...
Once I got the epidural, I was able to relax and focus on the task at hand: getting this baby out! I didn't feel sorry or like a loser for getting one, I was just glad I could focus. My nurse asked if I wanted to sit up to see if laboring that way would help- so I did. No more than 5 minutes later I could feel pain again. 10 minutes later and the contractions were in full swing again but my legs were the only thing numb! I didn't understand. I tried lying on each side and nothing helped. I was in complete pain again! After what seemed like hours, my anesthesiologist came in and saw me sitting up. My eyes were closed from the pain but I recognized her voice when she said, "No no no, (talking to my nurse) she needs to be on her back! The epidural only works when she's flat. The medication goes towards gravity." Now, I'm thinking, "How in the world does my nurse not know that!?" I don't know if I got a different epidural than other people but I always thought they continued to work! Well, they dont. Epidurals wear off. At least mine did. I was OK and comfortable because I remained on my back but, when it came time to pushing, I had to sit up and yup!- it wore off again.
4. Some hospitals don't allow photography. As gross or morbid as it sounds, I really wanted a picture of the baby's head coming out of me. I know someone who got a picture of the baby crowning and the shot is just amazing! This isn't a picture you'd wanna post to facebook or anything but I was one of the ones she allowed to see the picture and it was just awesome. Nothing is more incredible than life! I wanted that but unfortunately, some hospitals don't allow photography. I was able to have pictures taken before anything crazy was happening and once the baby was completely out but not during. It was a bit of a bummer. I still got some pretty cool and gross pictures of everything after she was born! *Always ask your Doctor questions like this so you aren't bummed at the last minute like I was!
5. YOU don't always deliver the placenta. I always heard that 10-20 minutes after the baby comes out, mom delivers the placenta. This wasn't the case for me. As soon as the baby popped out, the doctor passed the baby to the nurses and they immediately started working on getting the placenta out. They started massaging my belly and not more than 5 seconds later, they just pulled my placenta out by the cord! Much to my surprise, you don't always deliver the placenta. I guess they figured, pulling it out was easier. Very strange. I didn't get to see it and I kind of hoped I would. I don't know why- curiosity I guess! David said it looked like a semi-deflated, bloody balloon.
6. You can still feel yourself push with an epidural. A lot of women had told me that a con to having an epidural meant you can't feel yourself pushing which means you probably aren't pushing very good. This could mean no progress, possible vacuum assistance or c-section. For me, I could feel myself pushing and even though I was pushing for awhile, I still pushed the baby out without a vacuum. If this is a fear of yours, don't worry. You can still feel yourself pushing with an epidural. I was glad that they let me push for as long as they did. A few times the doctor mentioned a c-section but my nurse let me keep pushing.
7. Epidurals come with catheters. This is gross and I really hated this part but it is very necessary. If you don't have a catheter while you have an epidural, you will pee all over yourself. I didn't want to sit in my own urine just as much as the nursing staff didn't want to have to keep changing my sheets! I never saw the thing because it was out immediately after the baby came out so that was the good part. In fact, shortly after delivery and the epidural removal, they helped me up to the bathroom. Epidurals come with catheters but they are gone before you even notice they are there!
8. Pitocin means you can't get out of bed. Pitocin is what they used to induce me and one of the requirements while being on it is that they need to use a continuous fetal monitor on you at all times. I could only be off if it when I needed to use the bathroom but otherwise I had to stay in bed! This was so frustrating because I wanted to labor in different positions, walk around or bounce on a ball. I didn't realize I'd have to remain in bed at all times. They need to monitor the baby's heart rate so they use these ichy belts and they strap them to your tummy and you can't move. I hated that Pitocin means you can't get out of bed. Had I known that prior to agreeing to it, I probably would have asked for something else! I was so naive to all this stuff. I strongly advise you to be completely aware of everything you agree to!
9. Breathing is so important. It sounds silly but it is so true. A birthing class is a VERY useful tool that I, unfortunately, did not take advantage of. If you cannot control your breathing and focus through each contraction, it is going to be quite difficult. For me, I basically went into a panic attack when things got intense and I just could not get my breathing under control. My heart rate when out of wack, the baby's dropped and the nurse began getting worried. I cannot stress this enough- breathing is so important. If you've been through labor then you know what I'm talking about. Each contraction requires so much concentration. You have to breath and remember what is happening. My body knew what was happening but my mind was not on the same page. I remember praying that God just take the pain away but then I remembered that He said it would hurt and boy did He keep His promise. In the midst of my pain, I felt His presence- it was the most awesome feeling.
10. 3 hours of pushing feels like 3 minutes! I had a clock right above me so I could see exactly what time it was. Half way through pushing I was so exhausted and so tired that I literally fell asleep between each contraction and push. It probably seemed like forever to everyone in the room but to me, 3 hours felt like 3 minutes! Maybe I was just so out of it that I didn't care. When I saw my baby for the first time, those 3 hours felt like nothing. It was all so worth it!
11. My baby wasn't beautiful right when she came out. I always heard that baby's come out looking like total aliens after birth but, yours. Oh, yours will be the most gorgeous human you've ever laid eyes on. Please don't judge me when I say this but my baby was not gorgeous as soon as she came out. She was purple, bloody and had a gnarly cone head! (thank you 3 hours of pushing!) She was my precious baby girl and I loved her to the stars and back! I cried like I have never cried before because she was mine. I loved her more in a second than I could ever love anyone in years. But she was not cute- YET! Once they got her cleaned, changed and bundled up, then yes, she was adorable! I could see her face instead of blood and icky white goo. I saw her cute little nose and perfect lips! I kissed those lips the second she was in my arms. My baby wasn't beautiful right when she came out, but it certainly did not take long for that to change!
12. Seeing/feeling baby's head doesn't mean she's almost out. About half way through pushing, I heard, "Oh my gosh, I see her head!" Then I'd relax and the head would disappear! I'd push again and her head would almost come out and then it would suck back in. It wasn't until I pushed her head about halfway out that it stayed out! After her head came out the rest of her shortly followed. At one point I reached down and felt her hair! However, feeling baby's head doesn't mean she's almost out! Feeling her physically was super cool but it doesn't mean she's going to just slip right out. I had to wait and push for another couple of hours but that was still a neat milestone while pushing!
13. Being induced doesn't mean baby is coming soon. When the doctor first told us I was being induced he also said, "We'll have a baby by tonight!" Umm...no. I think by "tonight" he actually meant 2 and a half days later. Close though. Being induced doesn't mean baby is coming soon, so don't count on everything you hear at first. Birth is something so incredible but so unpredictable. We know what is going to happen but we have no clue in which order those things will occur.
At the end of the day, I love my L & D story because it is mine. It is unique and exactly how it was supposed to be. God was with me every step of the way and that is why I am completely content with it. I am so grateful for my amazing David who never left my side, my mom, Lindsey and Sophia. They were with me from start to finish and I couldn't have done it without their support.
Here's a few pictures from the best day of my life! :)
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